


The Fall

by Antichthoniae



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F, Nonbinary Character, Not entirely Endgame compliant, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Reader-Insert, a femme-aligned babe, nat's soulmate is enby though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:35:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27241276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antichthoniae/pseuds/Antichthoniae
Summary: Throughout everything she's been through, Natasha's soulmate is one of the few things that's kept her going no matter how tough things got. Her soulmate, though, doesn't yet know she exists.Atlas, on the other hand, spent most of their life thinking they'd already found The One, but things aren't always as they seem.-----Updates very sporadically because of my current schedule and health issues.
Relationships: Natasha Romanov (Marvel)/Original Female Character(s), Natasha Romanov (Marvel)/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Keep in mind - in the first couple chapters, Natasha will use she/her when referring to her soulmate just because she doesn't know them yet, but her soulmate is nonbinary. And chapters will be relatively short just to separate smaller scenes into individual stories, up until the plot starts picking up and I have more material to work with.
> 
> Also, just as a heads up (because I know from all my time on ao3 that some people despise fics that move too quickly) I want to say that the first chapter or two takes place a little while after the snap, but there will be a significant time skip eventually, because I don't want to waste time trying to stretch out the five years between infinity war and endgame. This is just so that I can focus on giving more attention and detail to the overall plot of the story, rather than taking time to write out the five years worth of character interaction that won't do much to further the plot on its own. 
> 
> Tysm to anyone who does read this and as always I'm super open to suggestions and criticism because god knows I need it if I want to continue to improve how I write.

Natasha was glad of only one thing, after Thanos had come and gone - that her soulmate was one of the lucky ones who had survived the snap. Before Thanos, she’d always found comfort in the connection she shared with a stranger, somewhere out there. It was something that gave her meaning in some of her darkest times, and something to hold onto when she couldn’t stand to be alone with her own thoughts. 

She hadn't met them yet, but their thoughts were always there in the back of her mind, though Nat wasn’t too keen of the thought that whoever lived there, in her head, could hear her thoughts as well. It wasn’t all of them, all the time, though. Natasha often didn’t hear from her soulmate for days at a time, but it wasn’t something unheard of. Hearing someone else’s voice in your head 24/7 would drive anyone crazy. 

And then there were days when all she heard was that voice in her head, soft and sweet, and the loveliest thing Natasha had ever heard. Those days, she was always sure that  _ today would be the day _ and she’d finally meet her mystery girl, but so far the universe had proved her wrong at every instance. It didn’t help to know that the louder her soulmate’s voice got, the closer she was. And then the voice would fade back to a normal capacity, signalling that her soulmate was no longer close by. 

That day in Wakanda, she couldn’t afford to think about anything other than the battle, and momentarily her soulmate was forgotten about, though that little voice was there with her just before things went south, and her soulmate’s presence had calmed her nerves before the fighting began. But when Thanos, with Thor’s axe buried deep in his chest, had done the inevitable and wiped out half of all life, when those of her teammates not gone were stumbling around the battlefield searching for the ones who wouldn't be coming back, Natasha had been sick with worry.

_ Was she one of them? _ she’d thought, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth.  _ Will I lose her, too?  _

And then through her haze of worry and anguish, Natasha had heard an alarmed voice say  _ Oh, god. Oh my god, what’s happening? _ and Natasha was filled with relief once she knew that her other half was safe, and  _ god,  _ did she love this girl whom she’d never even met. It shocked her, to so boldly admit such a thing to herself, but at the thought of potentially having lost her Natasha couldn’t exactly deny it anymore, and she knew that this person whose thoughts she’d only ever heard little snippets of was someone she couldn’t ever bear to lose.

* * *

The first time she saw her soulmate, Natasha didn’t even recognize her as so. Like she always did, whenever her soulmate’s voice grew clearer in her head, Natasha had surveyed the crowd around her, searching for anyone who stood out among them. Her gaze bypassed the men around her - her soulmate’s voice had always been distinct enough that Natasha could tell it was a feminine one, and once she’d first heard that voice for the first time, men all but stopped existing to her. Now, Natasha searched the people crowding around her on the busy sidewalk, bustling past as they went on with their normal lives. 

A dark-skinned woman, smoking on the stoop of an apartment building, who Natasha wrote off because the voice in her head sounded too smooth to belong to a smoker. Even if the woman was drop dead gorgeous, she wasn’t the one. 

A shorter girl, maybe a college student, running past with a coffee in her hand and a messenger bag over her shoulder. Too young, Natasha decided.

A tall, dark-haired woman (whose bangs were platinum and quite hard to miss) with an… interesting outfit, to say the least. Though she couldn’t help staring, really. It  _ was _ an interesting outfit - a white dress shirt, almost entirely unbuttoned to reveal a tight fitting tank top (A corset? She couldn’t tell, from this distance) and dark pants completed with a pair of combat boots. Natasha decided that, of all things, this woman’s obnoxiously large hat was what turned her off. It made the woman look like a witch, and there was enough of that vibe coming from Wanda already.

A pretty blonde, reading the newspaper at the bus stop just a few meters away. But Nat came to the conclusion that since her soulmate’s thoughts indicated she got most of her news from twitter, newspaper lady wasn’t it either. And blondes weren’t really her type.

She gave up on the search for the moment, when her stomach growled loudly to remind her what she’d come out for in the first place - something greasy and delicious that she wouldn't have to share with anyone back at the tower. She watched the witchy-looking woman go, when she walked past going the opposite way, and Nat’s gaze lingered for just a little too long before her soulmate mirrored her own thoughts and expressed her craving for pizza. Natasha couldn’t have agreed with her soulmate more, and she had lunch in a little pizzeria, thinking of her soulmate as she scarfed down three slices of pepperoni.

* * *

The second time Natasha came across her soulmate had been post-snap. In an empty world, missing the people she held close to her heart, Natasha didn’t get out much. When she did, it was only for a breath of fresh air or a moment’s peace from her tireless work. She’d welcome any distraction on the days that her team came back with bad news, or no news at all. Wandering the quiet, empty streets of the city, she was left alone with her thoughts still, and she wasn’t happy about it - but it was better than moping around the compound where Steve could be waiting around any corner to bully her into talking about the things she’d rather leave unsaid. Her troubles were hers alone, even if every member of the team was going through the same things. They’d all lost someone. Natasha was just too stubborn to cope with it in a healthy way.

She almost didn’t recognize her at first. It was the lack of her wide-brimmed hat, Natasha decided, that made Witch Girl unrecognizable at first. In the cool Autumn air, she’d forgone the open shirt and corset from last time for a thick looking wool sweater, with a pattern Nat couldn’t discern from this distance but looked like something she’d catch Steve wearing to a christmas party. She watched her for a few moments, as she made her way down the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street with her hands in her pockets. Natasha watched, openly enraptured by the pretty woman who, thankfully, took the place of her worrisome thoughts to distract her from the crushing ache in her heart. If Natasha’s soulmate wasn’t yet here to distract her, another pretty woman could do the trick for now. It wasn’t as if she was replacing her. Somewhere, wherever she was at the moment, said soulmate recited a grocery list in the back of Nat’s mind.

_ Eggs. _

Natasha thought the woman looked upset, her face showing more emotion the closer she got.

_ Milk. _

She was clearly crying, Natasha could tell, even at this distance.

_ More wine. _

She was almost directly across the street, and stopped for a second to look at her phone. She held it so tightly that her hand was turning white.

_ Flowers, for the funeral. _

And  _ oh, _ that surprised Natasha, and she momentarily forgot about the woman across the street. Her soulmate had lost someone, and recently. New loss seemed worse, somehow, after the snap. Life was so precious now that losing anyone could completely destroy a person, after all they’d lost already. Even after two years, Natasha knew it was never easy for any of these people, who tried to go on with their normal lives as best they could. 

Her soulmate’s thoughts were so saturated in her sorrow that Natasha couldn’t bear having to feel it after she’d left the compound for the day just to escape her own. It was still mid-afternoon, but it would be dark soon, and Natasha couldn’t stay out here forever. So, she decided that she’d stop by a liquor store on the way back and pick herself up a few bottles of wine as well to chase away those sorrows, both her soulmate’s and her own. Or something stronger, even. The night was still young.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, I'm super happy to be finally putting out the second chapter and I really hope you all like it! It's been already written and sitting in my drafts for the longest time, but amongst the stress of covid and my personal life, I had forgotten about this fic entirely, but I'm hoping to get back into the groove and continue writing this fic again, so keep an eye out for new chapters.

After the snap, life had seemed to just get worse and worse for Atlas Mason. They were one of the lucky ones who survived, but after that, life wasn’t much worth living anymore. They lost their job, in the year or so after it happened - let go because the company wasn’t expected to stay afloat much longer after so much loss, both financially and because of the people who were lost after Thanos came to earth. In the first year, things were bad. They were really bad. Atlas lost people to more than just Thanos - in the aftermath, suicide rates skyrocketed, and Atlas would be lying if they said they’d never given it a thought. So yeah, things had gotten bad that first year, but they’d had their soulmate with them every step of the way to provide much-needed emotional support.

Logan had been everything they could have asked for, and the two of them had been engaged for only a few months when Thanos arrived. With all that had gone since then, they’d postponed the wedding for a year or so, just until they adjusted to this new life. But the issues kept coming, and plans kept being pushed back. Bills were piling up, and Logan’s father had been diagnosed with cancer. It was bad at first, but his condition had seemed to be improving greatly. Almost two years after, and things were finally looking up.

Until Logan’s car was hit by some careless idiot who ran a red light, and he died in the same hospital his father was being treated at. 

After that, Atlas didn’t know how to go on. Although they’d loved Logan’s parents like their own, the two of them had nothing to offer that could replace the hole in her heart - in her very  _ being _ now that her soulmate was gone from this world. They put up with his family just long enough to attend his funeral (though  _ put up with _ is a poor choice of words - Atlas couldn’t bear to face them after losing him, but putting on a mask of indifference for their sake would make their parting of ways far easier). They offered their kindness, their sympathy and love, but Atlas could never live that life without Logan.

The pain, while never more physical than the sorrow manifesting itself as just feeling  _ sick _ for the longest time, was near unbearable. Losing a soulmate was always supposed to be one of the worst feelings a person could ever experience, and they were sure that nothing could possibly feel worse than this. And simultaneously, it felt like it would never get better.

But the day after his funeral, when Atlas was buried deep in the pile of blankets on their bed with no intention of getting up in the foreseeable future, they heard a voice. It was quiet, just barely there in the back of their mind, but the message was clear.

_ I’m sorry for your loss. _

Atlas didn’t know what to make of it for the longest time.

* * *

A week or so after the voice had appeared in their head for that one moment, Atlas came across an article from a few years ago, pre-snap, detailing the unique circumstances in which a person could have more than one soulmate. In some cases, people were just born with more than one, and lived their whole lives with two different voices in their head. And in many cases, when a person was found to have a second soulmate, it was due to the death of the first. The latter seemed to be the situation in which Atlas found themselves, and unwillingly so. They didn’t  _ want _ a second soulmate, not after losing Logan. But from what the article indicated, they were stuck with whoevers voice had replaced his. 

But in the weeks after his funeral, even though Atlas still hated the thought of someone else replacing their soulmate, they found that the voice in the back of their head was… comforting, in a way. The voice wasn’t very distinct yet - it never was when you first started hearing them - but Atlas could tell that this new person was a woman, and from the few sentences they’d heard, she seemed kind. But she was also broken, just as Atlas was.

The new voice only spoke directly to Atlas once, that day after Logan’s funeral, and every thought of hers that had made their way into Atlas’s mind since then made this woman sound dejected, like she’d already given up but kept going for reasons unknown to Atlas. Oftentimes, when the voice would crop up in the back of Atlas’s mind, they would hear her talking - thinking? - about the people she had lost, and how she felt directly responsible. Atlas didn’t know how anyone could think this whole situation was their fault, but some people had just been overcome with guilt after it had happened, despite the fact that nobody could have done anything to prevent it. Atlas’s soulmate (that word still bothered them, even weeks later, but it was something they’d have to get used to) thought of her family, the ones she’d lost, more often than anything else. The only other thought that could compare was ‘ _ What more could I have done to stop this? And what else can I do now, if anything?’ _

Among those thoughts, the one person whose name Atlas heard the most was Clint. She always (though the term is debatable, Atlas hardly heard anything from their soulmate for days at a time) thought about bringing him home, and how she felt like she was failing without him. If Atlas didn’t know any better, they would have thought that Clint was her soulmate. But truly, he could have been. Atlas had two soulmates, and it wasn’t impossible that her soulmate could as well. Either way, though, Clint was important to her, and she felt lost without him. Atlas hoped that soon, she’d find some comfort. Not just because having someone else’s self-deprecating thoughts in their head was an awful thing to deal with, but because Atlas was beginning to care for this woman, even if it was just friendly concern for now. 

But Atlas wouldn't allow themselves to care so much that she would replace Logan. 

* * *

It was late winter when Atlas first saw her (though, like Natasha each time before, they weren’t yet aware of the connection they had), just a few months before the second anniversary of the snap. After the events of Thanos coming to earth, not many people had seen much of the Avengers. Some of the remaining members (namely Captain America and Bruce Banner) had given vague statements to the public about what had happened, but others seemed to disappear into the shadows, hiding from the shell of a world that remained. The Black Widow had been among them, but not many people expected anything else from a highly trained assassin. Disappearing was her forté, and no one expected her to return to the public eye. But here she was, across the street from the coffee shop where Atlas had stopped for a late breakfast, making her way down the shoveled sidewalk. They hadn't recognized her at first, but the taller man beside her wasn’t hard to place - not many men were built like Captain America was, and the supersoldier wasn’t easy to miss. He hadn't changed much since that last time Atlas had heard anything about him - the beard was gone now, and his hair was neater, but he was still far more recognizable than the Black Widow ( _ Natasha, _ they reminded themself) was. Her hair was longer, now, and the blonde had given way to her natural hair, though it still remained, faded and wispy, where her hair blended from red to her bleached section at the ends.

And she looked upset. Or maybe just dissatisfied and irritable, being out in this weather with her teammate who looked far happier than she did. Captain America - Steve - seemed cheerful, compared to Natasha’s soured expression, and he carried a large coffee cup in his gloved hand. Even in his puffy winter coat and large boots, he still looked a little intimidating, despite the upbeat expression on his face. Atlas got the feeling that he was the one who dragged Natasha out into the world today.

And Atlas so desperately wished they had someone like that. Despite the fact that they still got up each day and ventured out into a world that was so much more grey and disappointing than it had been two years earlier, it was because they had responsibilities, not because it was easy to do so. Atlas truly had nobody left, and the few people they spoke to on a day to day basis were nowhere near enough to make up for the lack of human interaction that they craved so much. Nobody left to provide the emotional support, affection, and attention a person needed. With both parents gone many years prior and a dead soulmate, there hadn't been many people for Atlas to find comfort in these past couple of years. They’d had friends, from work or otherwise, but Atlas soon found out that they were selfish and unwilling to put up with someone in such a low place. After Logan died and Atlas’s mental health worsened, none of them had wanted anything to do with them. 

The voice of their soulmate pulled Atlas out of their thoughts, and by the time they looked up, the two across the street were gone.

_ It’s too damn cold out here, and we should be getting back soon. Don’t know how much longer I can take his optimism. _

Atlas chuckled at that. Optimism was rare for them, most days, but they understood how it could be overwhelming coming from someone else. But even so, Atlas craved to have someone so optimistic to cancel out the loneliness and empty feelings. They hoped that one day, even though their new soulmate wasn’t the kind they wanted and didn’t seem to have any optimism whatsoever, could be that person for them. They had never craved friendship so much from someone they hardly even knew at all. Atlas didn’t even know the woman’s name, but they wanted to know that and so much more about her.


End file.
